I decided to go ahead and rank all of the Pokémon games for it’s 30th Anniversary. Before I get to that though, let’s just go though a few of my favourites, after that, we’ll rank each of them from worst to best.
Best Friend and Rival: Nemona
Runner-ups: Blue/Gary, Lillie, Wally
This was the big surprise here, seeing as the original remained my favourite for literally my entire fucking life, but eventually, in came Nemona to finally knock him off his pedestal.
What really works about Nemona was how grounded and emotional her story was. You learn over the course of the game that she’s kind of lonely and you’re the first real friend she’s had in a long time, and then you do the epilogue and you see exactly how lonely she really is.
It’s a story you have to go looking for, but she’s still interesting if you care to pay attention. I genuinely did not expect to love the character this much, especially in one of the more recent Pokémon games.
Best Villains: Archie and Maxie
Runner-ups: Giovanni, Lysandre, Lusamine
Generation 3 is unique in the sense that it had version exclusive villains, though their roles were canonized in Emerald. Which, hey, I’m completely fine with, as I always preferred Team Aqua anyways.
They were the perfect compliments to one another, striking a balance between tense stakes, and the kind of plot that’s actually befitting of Pokémon’s childish aesthetic and world-building. I like that their driving force wasn't ambition or ideals, it’s just that they’re stupid, which is how it often works in real life.
The remakes did attempt to get a little more philosophical, depicted as being stuck in their ways and needing the new generation to open their eyes, and while I can respect that, I can still appreciate the dumbasses who looked at “too much water” and thought doubling down on it would benefit humanity.
Best Champion: Iris
Runner-ups: Diantha, Wallace, Cynthia
Iris is one of Generation 5’s hidden gems in my opinion, permanently cemented in it's sequel as the best champion these games have ever had. I thought she put up a genuinely fun challenge and although she uses Dragon types almost exclusively, this was right before Dragon types got nerfed into the fucking ground, so it’s a great final hurrah for the type.
A part of it does come down to personal bias, as I thought she was one of the best companions in the animated series. It’s also just good vibes man, that dress is immaculate, and you get to fight her in basically outer space! So, yeah, it really was one of the best times I’ve ever had during a final battle.
Generation 8: Sword and Shield
The death of handhelds was a mistake.
The problem with having evolved past the need for the DS, was that handhelds made it possible to produce games relatively quickly for relatively cheap. There’s probably a reason why Mario Kart went from like 30 or 40 dollars, to 80 dollars. And there’s a reason why we don’t see Kingdom Hearts at all anymore, people wanted “graphics, graphics, graphics” and that’s exactly what they’re gonna get.
This hit Pokémon especially hard and while I’m hesitant to call Sword and Shield lazy, even Scarlet and Violet tried to do something cool. Because Sun and Moon at least tried to tell a character focused story, Black and White at least tried to have a heavy theme, but with Sword and Shield it seems like they put in absolutely no effort by comparison.
It was popular at the time to state the opinion that everything about Pokémon was good except for the games, and while some of the new Pokémon designs were still neat, I have refused to buy Pokémon games at launch ever since this one came out. I've lost my trust in them.
Generation 4: Diamond/Pearl and Platinum
It’s here where it starts to come down to subjectivity because at the time, Generation 4 felt like it was the most polished and complete it has had been, like it could’ve just ended there and I would’ve been satisfied. That is, until HeartGold and SoulSilver, which, okay, now you can stop.
The problem was, well, the Sinnoh region is supremely dull. And you’d be hard pressed to find a single thing, outside of maybe the Underground, that the games both before and after it didn’t do better.
So, while this seemed like the apex of the Pokémon formula, at the same time, what you’re left with is still just a supremely slow, colourless, and overly serious affair.
Generation 5: Black and White 1 and 2
I have a lot of mixed feelings. It’s a bit of a weird one because the story is really trying to be so serious, and be about really serious things, but the ultimate conclusion is still “Wow! I sure do love opinions!”
The notion of Pokémon ethics had always been a bugbear with audiences, in fact, I believe there was also a similar reason why it was decided that Pikachu didn’t like to stay in a ball. But this was their chance to finally tackle the ethics of their own premise and the game won’t let you, it doesn’t want you to think about it.
The thing is, and I’m gonna be blunt, but have some fucking whimsy. This isn’t Bioshock or Fallout or whatever it is we’re talking about, the conflict should just be about the characters and their own personal struggles, there doesn’t always have to be this world ending, grand-stakes plot.
What ultimately bumps this generation up is it’s sequel, which provides a better overall experience by virtue of not doing that. It’s just a lot easier to go back to, so yeah, they kind of saved it, that's nice.
Generation 9: Scarlet and Violet
I was tempted to rank Scarlet and Violet a lot lower just by virtue of it being an unfinished, broken piece of shit, but the open world nature of this game leads to the story being way more hands off than it had been in years, combined with simply just having a neat character here and there, which leads to this one barely escaping containment.
It’s clear that there was at least some effort put into this, it just needed way more time in the oven. And I’m still not getting my hopes up for the future, but I guess we’ll wait and see.
Generation 7: Ultra Sun and Ultra Moon
Oh boy, Top 5!
It’s here where we get to the point where I could recommenced that an actual, normal human being to go play it and they would probably really enjoy it. Apologies if you’re stuck with the non-Ultra versions by the way, but I’m still laughing at you. Loser!!!
You can say what you want about it spamming text at you from every goddamn corner, but it still gets by on being a damn well made game. I know, remember when that was the case? The fact that it was way too wordy is really it’s only problem, and once it actually starts to get going, it’s actually quite engaging.
Lillie is an interesting character and she’s one of my favourites. It hits a comparable note to "Pokémon 3: The Movie", which was about a little girl who misses her Mom and Dad, and that alone ended up creating the best story Pokémon had ever told. Well, I can’t say the same here, but still, I respect it.
Generation 2: Gold/Silver and Crystal
This is probably as close to what we’re gonna get to my ideal Pokémon game. It does a good job of mainly focusing on you and your own personal adventure, and each side-story you encounter is it’s own self contained thing. There’s even an entire second region to explore and there’s fun things to see in there. It blew my mind as a kid!
I mentioned HeartGold and SoulSilver earlier and in my opinion, it remains literally the best Pokémon game ever fucking made, which took the base game, fattened it up, and completely polishes it.
What holds this game back a little is a lot of the new Pokémon are in Kanto for some reason, and it can get a little grindy, but still, pretty good.
Generation 1: Red/Blue and Yellow
Oh boy, Top 3!
I’m surprised at how high the originals ended up ranking, but to this day it’s still a pretty tight experience from beginning to end, and you just can’t beat a nice, open ended game that’s not spamming text at you from every corner. It respects your intelligence enough to allow you to think for yourself.
There’s a phrase you probably all know which is “nostalgia goggles”, but I don’t know if it’s really nostalgia if you’re playing an old game not to relive old memories, but because it just does things you want that the newer games just don’t do anymore. And it will still hold value so long as that’s the case.
The only thing that holds this game back are maybe some of the dungeons, and the Safari Zone is actual shit. But still, this one is still being held in high regards for a good reason.
Generation 6: X and Y
Alright, so, if Black and White pretty much almost killed the franchise, then X and Y brought it right back. The Kalos region remains genuinely delightful to me, and they did all that by catering to little girls, as they fucking should.
It’s got a really fun villain, pretty environments, the characters were absolutely charming, and the dialogue basically could’ve just been taken straight out of the animated series and that’s a good thing.
There’s not much else to say, but this is probably the best place to start if you don’t want to play a Pokémon game from like three decades ago. My only critique is that it’s maybe a bit on the easy side for my liking?
Generation 3: Ruby/Sapphire and Emerald
Okay, I was born in the early 90s, so I’ve been here since the very first Pokémon games, but this is ultimately what’s responsible for making me a life-long Pokémon fan. It’s got good game-play, it still looks amazing, an actual good story, colourful bad guys, man, it really is just the full package.
If you're looking for the ideal Pokémon experience, it really would be a DS with HeartGold or SoulSilver, and Emerald stuck up it’s butt. And there is literally nothing about Hoenn that is bad except for maybe the water.